Careful With The Wishing

So, you’ve had it with the status quo and you make a wish and then you get your wish in spades?

You can think you’re really spiritual if you want or, you can think that your subconscious was just waiting to put those puzzle pieces together and sock it to you.
Or you can think something else. Whatever.

OK. So about three years ago I got constipated, really constipated and the next crap that happened was I got diagnosed with cirrhosis and out came the prescription pad and lactulose went onto the paper. I was still taking ex-lax and still either constipated or I was tethered to the facilities. The lactulose was making me bloat

I was not a happy camper even if I was seated on a throne.

So I made one of those life changing thoughts like ‘I’ve totally had it with this constipation business. I wish it would quit.'

I haven’t dared go out of town since.

So, does all this diarrhoea mean I should go on a lecture circuit and tell people how to wish effectively and abundantly? My timing would have to be way better than it is right now to even entertain one engagement. Forget the circuit business.

Anyway, my wishing/abundance pulling ability coincided with my discovery of mini boxes of the cutest little mandarin oranges. I pigged out. Every time I eat those dinky little oranges, I have a very active lifestyle with very speedy movement from the living room to the washroom. I come back slower than I go, but if I turn around to go back, my speed really revs for about ten feet.

If the oranges are doing it, there goes a good career. It’s just about the end of mandarin season anyway.

If I don’t eat oranges today maybe I can go away tomorrow. We shall see.

I hope I don’t get this wrong.

Others’ Agendas

Having Cirrhosis is not like having an induction range, a marble statue, or a classic car.

Cirrhosis and the accompanying Ascites fluid build-up can wipe you out unexpectedly by making you so miserable you’d like to explode when you eat something your digestive system can’t deal with and your small intestine begins to expand and expand pushing the fluid of Ascites up against organs like the lungs, pancreas, heart and eventually shoving it up until the brain experiences an effect like in-rolling waves of fluid. It can certainly freak a person out and make them skittish about anything that might cause a repeat of that very uncomfortable/scary experience.

Without a functional liver, your digestive system can’t deal with much, let me tell you. Just about any food, especially spiced, fatty or sulphur containing foods like onions and garlic can bring on debilitating bloating. Forget onion rings and orders of fries. Forget pigging out on Cherry Cheesecake, too.

You meet up with your MD or your healthcare practitioner and they have all these really great solutions just ready to shove right at you and you’re scared silly and say stuff like, “Not today!”

The MD says you’re a difficult patient………or you buy the stupid drugs, but just don’t take them. That’s a waste of money. I tell my pharmacist not to fill the prescription until I order it filled. That may not work so well for me some day. Right now though, it’s saving me money.

Then your naturopath comes up with some protocol you’ve never heard of and s/he’s really enthused about injecting you right now. If I’m desperate, I’ll likely go for it, if…I get answers I can live with.

I’m much more apt to make excuses that I hope sound plausible. I have several ready to choose from if I’m scared silly that whatever it is will set off that bloating thing that displaces the Ascites fluid and compromises my organs.

I’m no Luddite when it comes to computers and research. I’ll be researching whatever was suggested and seeing how the ideas related to the treatment resonate with me. Once I’m ready for what the treatment can do and have enough ease, faith, whatever, that I can benefit from the treatment and at least have a 30% placebo effect chance going for me, I’ll be there with my money.

Until then I hope the NP has faith in his or her words to get me feeling comfortable and ready for a new protocol.

So why wait?

People in the Health and Sickness Industry know how to treat diseases, but they most likely have never personally had the disease and lived with that experience. They really don’t know what scares me silly, or wipes me out. I know intimately how the condition impacts me and if I refuse to be my own advocate, I’m likely setting up a good game of Blame the Professional.

That is not a smart move stress-wise and thus recovery-wise.