Others’ Agendas

Having Cirrhosis is not like having an induction range, a marble statue, or a classic car.

Cirrhosis and the accompanying Ascites fluid build-up can wipe you out unexpectedly by making you so miserable you’d like to explode when you eat something your digestive system can’t deal with and your small intestine begins to expand and expand pushing the fluid of Ascites up against organs like the lungs, pancreas, heart and eventually shoving it up until the brain experiences an effect like in-rolling waves of fluid. It can certainly freak a person out and make them skittish about anything that might cause a repeat of that very uncomfortable/scary experience.

Without a functional liver, your digestive system can’t deal with much, let me tell you. Just about any food, especially spiced, fatty or sulphur containing foods like onions and garlic can bring on debilitating bloating. Forget onion rings and orders of fries. Forget pigging out on Cherry Cheesecake, too.

You meet up with your MD or your healthcare practitioner and they have all these really great solutions just ready to shove right at you and you’re scared silly and say stuff like, “Not today!”

The MD says you’re a difficult patient………or you buy the stupid drugs, but just don’t take them. That’s a waste of money. I tell my pharmacist not to fill the prescription until I order it filled. That may not work so well for me some day. Right now though, it’s saving me money.

Then your naturopath comes up with some protocol you’ve never heard of and s/he’s really enthused about injecting you right now. If I’m desperate, I’ll likely go for it, if…I get answers I can live with.

I’m much more apt to make excuses that I hope sound plausible. I have several ready to choose from if I’m scared silly that whatever it is will set off that bloating thing that displaces the Ascites fluid and compromises my organs.

I’m no Luddite when it comes to computers and research. I’ll be researching whatever was suggested and seeing how the ideas related to the treatment resonate with me. Once I’m ready for what the treatment can do and have enough ease, faith, whatever, that I can benefit from the treatment and at least have a 30% placebo effect chance going for me, I’ll be there with my money.

Until then I hope the NP has faith in his or her words to get me feeling comfortable and ready for a new protocol.

So why wait?

People in the Health and Sickness Industry know how to treat diseases, but they most likely have never personally had the disease and lived with that experience. They really don’t know what scares me silly, or wipes me out. I know intimately how the condition impacts me and if I refuse to be my own advocate, I’m likely setting up a good game of Blame the Professional.

That is not a smart move stress-wise and thus recovery-wise.